LEMON AND LIME He's clean, too clean. Today's the day and everybody knows it. His friends, family, and even close strangers have filled this house, all wanting top touch this boy as he comes down the stairs. Look at him, just *look* at him. Sunday best(better!), shiny black shoes, million dollar smile, skin scrubbed to the bone, he hasn't missed a trick. But it's *his* moment, so quiet down. Tantalizing, that's the only way to describe him. *Tantalizing*. Look at him take those stairs--one step at a time. And who, Lord, who else is at the top.--who else could it be giving him the very first pat on the back? Of course it is--it's Uncle Lou. My he loved him he really did. Give a cigar to Uncle Lou. So *what* if the doctors told him to give them up? This is a special day. Give him one of his Havana Specials. Christ, Uncle Lou, they gave this one its very own plane. Honest. A whole plane just for this one cigar. It sat in the third seat, first class, window. This cigar's a well-heeled traveller. But God, will you look at him?! Makes your eyes want to weep. Makes them well up and sting and makes you want to cry out and share in the laughter and the joy. We're so happy for you, Davie, so happy. Where are his parents? There, over there. Can we move in on them? A few words, perhaps? Your mother and I, just the best. Wishing you, just the best. They're speechless, folks, and understandably. Oh, look at that Cousin Amy, pinching him like the day he was born. But look at him take it! That's a *man* coming down those stairs, nothing but. Grandma, Grandma, where are you going? She's running, down the stairs to the bottom. She's got something up her sleeve, boys, I'll lay you odds on that one. What *is* she doing? She's stopping. Wait. Wait a minute Is she doing what I think she's doing, by God, she is! She's belting it out, arms stretched to the gods in the sky: *Hello Dolly, well Hello Dolly, it's so nice to have you back where you belong...* Leave it to Grandma to pick up on that. It was so *there*, how *was* it we could have missed it? Well, I'll tell you. That boy, will you look at him? Will you just look? That boy? Why *is* he so clean? Why does he move *so* well? Is this his wedding day? Can't be. Where's the blushing bride? Then where is he headed, dressed like he is? He can't be headed just anywhere, that's for sure. No, he's taking those steps like he's got himself a purpose. He's got the world in the palm of his mighty hand, folded into the crease of his new wool slacks, tucked into the lapel of his Pierre Cardin jacket: he's got it all over him, and it's fixing to burst. Damn! Damn if he isn't taking those stairs two at a time. My God, ladies and gentleman, we here at the house are simply flabbergasted. If only you were here, folks, if only you were here. This is indeed a momentous turn of events. Two steps for the price of one. Damn if he isn't doing it like he's been doing it all his life. Can anyone be cooler? Slick. My God, turn off the cool juice, give us mortals a chance. Lemon and lime, gods and godzillas, orangutangs and marshmallow pies, that boy is something else. Something else altogether. Not entirely of this Earth. What *is* he going to do for an encore? No ritual bow, no tip of the head could possibly suffice. This is grandeur, folks, today's royalty. Head and shoulders, people this boy towers. How about the door, the crowd murmurs, how will he handle the door? The breathing has slowed; the crowd is hushed. My God. My God my God my God. Like a *champ*, friends, a true *champ*. Well I for one, am speechless. We've been bowled right over. Knocked off our seats and teleported to Pluto, we've got no hope of return. Can you feel it? Can you feel what's happening here? There's a change going down. These people are being changed. They're being *changed* for the rest of their *lives*. That boy has walked out the door and he ain't *comin'* back. This is a day and a half, folks, and I won't be surprised to find a few casualties back behind their stairs. Lord, I need to rest. Find me some water and a cushiony chair. Put my feet up, slip a pillow 'neath my head. Sing me a lullaby and hush out the light. Child, this has certainly been: one helluva day.